First Signs

I am not sure if I will ever post this…

December 13, 2013.

Just got the positive pregnancy test… so here we go again!

I took the test the day before my missed period because I was so sure it was going to be negative that I just wanted it done, and my mind cleared of those “what if?” thoughts I had had for the last 2 weeks and I could just move on and stop obsessing.

I learned very quickly how obsessive your mind can get when you are officially and consciously “trying” to get pregnant. You start tracking days, counting days, watching your body for changes, calculating.. thinking every twinge in your body is “something”… you Google ‘super early pregnancy symptoms’ and basically drive yourself nuts.

Looking back, there were a few signs very early on that I was pregnant.. all of which (subtle as they were) lead me to take two pregnancy tests in a week.

The first one, 5 days before my expected period.. was negative.

It was sitting on the counter and Neal said “so what does that mean?” I told him it meant it was either too early to test or it was a no-go. That was on a Tuesday. I Googled and read hundreds of comments from women who said they knew they were pregnant the very next day.. or  just a few days later, or some even claimed to know HOURS later. I kinda call bullsh** on some of that.. I mean.. you conceive and then 6 hours later you have morning sickness already and you are throwing up? That just doesn’t seem right.

But, I was still a little dejected and then very much decided that I was not pregnant because I had no symptoms. At least none of those… no tender breasts, no nausea, no massive headaches…

I tested again on Friday and got our positive response.

Looking back, there were a few signs very early on that I was pregnant.. all which if they happened and I wasn’t “trying” I would have thought nothing of:

-I gagged when I opened a package of hamburger. The SMELL WAS SO STRONG. I almost couldn’t make dinner that night and that never happens with raw meat.

-I had slight headaches for a week and I don’t usually get headaches.

-My skin cleared up. For the last year I’ve been a ProActive commercial (thanks hormones!) and suddenly my skin was much, much nicer and I had 1 new zit as opposed to my usual 12 new a day.

-I was dizzy. Not to the point where I’d pass out, but when I stood up the world moved around a bit.

-sweets didn’t sound good. Not to the point where they made me ill to think of.. but I didn’t crave sweets or chocolate. Very unlike me.

-my digestion slowed down a bit.

All very subtle things, but now I see they were all signs that something was happening.